marriage

[Mosa Seetsa]

A lot of adventists in my community are getting married to or dating non adventists,and no matter how much evidence we get that marriages like that neva succeed,we just somehow do it.ours parents have spent time discouraging this type of marriages but in vain.

Ladyies give reasons like,the gentlemen in the church dont ask them out,and the gentlemen say the ladies dont accept their proposals,a vicious circle.the fact of the matter is there are more females than there are males,and so it gives the ladies a reason to seek partners outside.

worst of all they tend to date the most nortorious of human beings (well 4 adventists),dey will either be drunkards,smokers or atheist (does not believe in God).and its amazing that adventists can stoop so low,and allow to be degraded by the devil.


I often try to discuss the subject with them but in vain as they will say its because i have boyfriend in the church that is why i have it so easy,and that is plain nonsense.does any one have tips as to the measures we can employ to bring the ladies to ther GOD given senses

[Kym]

Pray. A lot. On another level get someone toactually talk to them. The thing is even though your advice may be spot on, it would coe across to them as someone who has a boyfriend trying to deprive themof theirs. So maybe instead to you talking to them approach some of the older/other ladies in the church who have gone through the same thing - non-SDA husbands etc and let them talk to the young ladies and let them know how life really is when you are uequally yoked. Hopefully by developing a rapport with them a difference can be made.

[Adrian]

There's probably not much you can do besides pray, like Kym suggested. I'm sure they already know that they're compromising. Pestering someone too much about their decisions can just drive them away.

"Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers.... what part has a believer with an unbeliever?" 2 Corinthians 6:14a, 15b

[Christina]

Adrian, are you saying that if you're an adventist, you shouldn't date someone who isn't, even if they are a amazing christian who has their heart filled with god? That's not right, it shouldn't matter what denomination you are, as long as you two both agree that the only way to god is through the salvation of jesus christ, nothing else really matters....

[Adrian]

Actually yes, there is more that matters. Salvation depends on faith in Christ, yes, but if God has revealed light to us we better not ignore it. We're to keep growing in knowledge, and not growing is not God's will for you: "Therefore, leaving the discussion of the elementary principles of Christ, let us go on to perfection, not laying again the foundation of repentance from dead works and of faith toward God, of the doctrine of baptisms, of laying on of hands, of resurrection of the dead, and of eternal judgment" Hebrews 6:1-2. Maybe you're not very solidly grounded in SDA beliefs and how different they are from most other denominations, but there are major differences. For example, thinking that God tortures sinners eternally in hell fire for a lifetime of sin on earth makes God out to be very cruel and unloving!

If you marry someone who doesn't believe what you believe religiously, you're compromising you're faith. It might be a good idea to have Bible studies with this person. But even here, you don't want to marry someone who changed their beliefs just to please you.